I walked into Safeway Friday night, and it slapped me right in the face. Mothers Day.
I can kind of ignore it when I hear the ad's on TV or see them in the paper, but when the day draws near, and you walk into a grocery store and you can barley see the ceiling for all of the Mothers Day balloons, well then It kind of sends me into a panic.
It's anxiety. It's the anxiety of not having a Mom near by. Mom's are such a safety net, and such a source of loving support that when yours isn't near, it's never MORE apparent then when everyone else is celebrating theirs!
Today I celebrate My Mom, albeit in a very different way then everyone else.
I bought one of those balloons - a blue one, her favorite, and I took awhile to sit down and write a heart felt note just as if I was filling out a card to her.
Then, this afternoon I walked out to my balcony and let it go up to the heavens, and cried. and cried. and cried. I miss her. I think each day gets easier and harder, and I'm not even sure how to explain that.
Some days I'm fine, and the next I feel like theirs a Mom shaped hole in my chest.
The best I can do is remember her, celebrate her and draw up in my memory her smile. Her laugh. The things that made her special to me, and the things that make me miss her so much.
She's a great Mom. I just wish she wasn't so far away.
Miss you Momma, today, and every day. Happy Mothers Day to you!